She was 45.
There's such a tangle of emotions right now that it's difficult to unravel. I know she's in a better place, but at the moment it seems small comfort. I grieve for the husband and daughter she left behind who now have to make their way without her. I regret not having gotten to know her better than I did. I grieve because my DH does and I cannot help but share his emotions. I worry about losing DH, or about my family losing me.
I thought I'd come to terms with my mortality the first time I lost a friend, almost 20 years ago, but I discover that I haven't. Not really.
But I also need to remember that although death may find me at any time, I shouldn't be so wary of it so much that I fail to live.
We cannot banish dangers, but we can banish fears. We must not demean life by standing in awe of death. ~David Sarnoff (from quotegarden.com)